With no major streaming series debut this coming week, it’s all about the movies! Specifically, Jake Gyllenhaal’s Road House remake, recent Oscar winner Anatomy of a Fall, and the VOD debuts of Matthew Vaughn’s Argylle and Jason Statham’s The Beekeeper.


SERIES

Testament: The Story of Moses

27 March 2024 – Netflix

The only notable series release this week, Testament: The Story of Moses is a three-part miniseries that tells… well, the story of Moses. I think the title kind of spoiled that one! Combing scripted drama with historical and religious experts, this big budget docudrama explores the life of one of the most well-known Biblical figures, from being discovered as a baby in a basket on the banks of the Nile, to his quest to lead the people of Israel into the desert to the prophesied promise land.


MOVIES

Road House

21 March 2024 – Prime Video

I just recently watched the late Patrick Swayze’s 1980s cheesefest classic Road House and it still holds up as a really good time. Now it’s time to see if director Doug Liman’s modern day remake can live up to it. This new movie sees Jake Gyllenhaal playing the role of Dalton, except now he’s a disgraced ex-UFC fighter who finds himself accepting a gig to clean up a Florida roadhouse – actually named “The Roadhouse” this time – from the hard-drinking troublemaking local rabble. His efforts see him run afoul of the son of an imprisoned mafia boss though, prompting the arrival of the crime boss’ enforcer, Knox, played by actual UFC fighter Conor McGregor making his movie debut. Early reviews have been pretty favourable thus far, with special mention made of McGregor’s balls-to-the-wall wild man and Liman leaning hard into the original’s 80s action tone.

Anatomy of a Fall

21 March 2024 – Prime Video

Last Friday I posted that recent Oscar winner Poor Things was available for rental, only to find it showing up on Disney+ a day later with absolutely zero fanfare. Now another Oscar winner has popped up on a streaming platform without a single announcement, as Best Screenplay-winning Anatomy of a Fall has silently been made available on Amazon Prime Video. This French-produced legal drama is directed and co-written by Justine Triet and stars Sandra Hüller as a novelist (conveniently also named Sandra) forced to prove her innocence when her husband is mysteriously found dead near the isolated mountain chalet they shared with only their visually impaired son. While Sandra and her subsequent legal defense team insist her husband’s death was the result of an accidental fall, the prosecution try to prove a more sinister scenario.

Shirley

22 March 2024 – Netflix

Unless you’re American, there’s a fairly good chance that – just like me – you’ve never heard of Shirley Chisolm. Hell, even if you are American, you probably haven’t heard of her despite the fact that Chisolm was a political trailblazer, as she became the first black woman elected to US Congress in 1968. Written and directed by Oscar-winning filmmaker John Ridley (12 Years a Slave), Shirley is a new biopic starring screen icon Regina King as Chisolm, telling the story of her humble Brooklyn beginnings, her election to Congress, and then, in 1972, her audacious, boundary-breaking campaign to try and become the first black US Presidential candidate for a major party. Alongside King, Shirley also gives us one of the last performances of the late, great Lance Reddick.

Retribution

25 March 2024 – Showmax

Liam Neeson is Liam Neeson-ing again! By this point in the 71-year-old astounding late caree pivot, you know exactly what you’re in for when you see his name on the poster for a new action movie. And the latest film to follow the formula established in 2008’s Taken, with a dash of Speed mixed into it, is Retribution. Directed by Nimród Antal (the filmmaker behind the criminally underappreciated Predators), this action thriller sees Neeson as Matt Turner, a brooding financier in Berlin, Germany, who receives an alarming phone call while driving his kids to school. According to the distorted voice on the other end of the line, there is a bomb under his car set, set to detonate if he gets out or seeks help. The only way for him or his kids to keep breathing is to follow the bomber’s cryptic instructions.


VOD RENTALS/PURCHASES

The following movies have recently become available for digital purchase/rental:

Argylle

Purchase: Google Play Movies – R200 / Apple TV – R200

Rental: Google Play Movies – R169 / Apple TV – R170

I would have loved to love Argylle far more than I actually did. Unfortunately, despite a very game and talented cast led by Bryce Dallas Howard, Sam Rockwell, Bryan Cranston, Henry Cavill, and John Cena, and director Matthew Vaughn bringing all his incredibly distinct action-filmmaking flair to the table, this spy romp just falls short of the mark thanks to a goofy third act than undermines a lot of the film’s earlier good will. I’m keeping plot details to a minimum here as it’s very twisty plotting is one of its selling points. In fact, going in completely blind is recommended. To that point, if you’ve somehow managed to stay spoiler-free thus far, and you’re willing to risk it a bit longer, Argylle will be showing up on AppleTV+ in the near future as it is an Apple Films production. Given that Argylle has a rather steep rental price compared to other recent releases, that may just be the better option.

The Beekeeper

Purchase: Google Play Movies – R161 / Apple TV – R170

Rental: Google Play Movies – R45 / Apple TV – R50

If you’re looking for even more action, but this time without any semblance of a remotely twisty or clever plot, Jason Statham’s The Beekeeper is now also available for rental. Directed by David Ayer (Fury, Suicide Squad), this skop, skiet, en donner production sees Statham as Adam Clay, an ex-government operative whose job it was to “protect the hive” before living out his days as a beekeeper. However, his peaceful retirement is violently interrupted when a close friend commits suicide after falling victim to an online phishing scam and losing all her own money as well as the funds of the charity she manages. As an angered Clay takes revenge on the local scammers, he unwittingly uncovers a multimillion-dollar criminal conspiracy that reaches up far higher than anybody could have predicted. And yes, it’s every bit as silly as it sounds. In fact, as soon as the credits began to roll on this one in the cinema, I turned to a friend and remarked that this feels like it should have been an eTV Friday Action Night movie. PS: Look out for an absolutely absurd “South African” merc in the film’s final act.